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iheartgod175 · 11 months ago

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Correction Course: What to Expect in SRBA Reloaded!

It took me a long time to get this post about since life kicked me in the pants, but as promised, I am going to make a full post addressing the criticisms leveled at SRBA and what will be changed in the remastered edition, Super Readers’ Biggest Adventure Reloaded.

Since I’m not someone who can’t learn from her mistakes, I’ll start off with the valid criticisms to my story, Super Readers’ Biggest Adventure, which I have addressed with others who’ve read the story in some private messages (those who read this, you know who you are ^^)

1. The religious themes. I’m no less religious than I was when I first started, but going back I admit that the Christian themes were way, WAY overused here. I still laugh/cringe over the Jesus part myself, haha. I thought I was doing something cool there, but man. I really DID go overboard, and in all honesty, it wasn’t necessary. For those who pointed it out, I take full responsibility for it, and apologize for that. Later installments in the Gaiden series do not have this, though, with Darkness Rewrite being the only exception due to Prince Charming’s throwaway line. Reloaded does have a few metaphors/archetypes for several characters in the Bible (ie. Jeremiah is a blend of both David and Paul, while Chaos’ original character is supposed to mirror Saul before his fall from grace) and some parallels to Scripture, but I definitely won’t go crazy with that like I did in the original.

2. The worldbuilding/lore. For context, I wrote SRBA when I was in high school. So the quality of the writing is…much to be desired. I admit, I had trouble keeping track of the world building and lore for a while, and often when I was adding things into the Gaiden series, it was due to multiple, MULTIPLE rereads to make sure that I wasn’t retroactively retconning everything I wrote back then. As it was my first time working on detailing a large world, and since I made up a lot of things on the fly, a lot of things didn’t make sense back then. I’ve long since learned a lot about how to world build properly and am putting that into effect with the remaster, retconning and adding a few things—I wouldn’t call myself a master, but I’m not a beginner like I was before. While I don’t hate the lore that I created for it, there are things that could’ve been explained better. There are some things that could’ve been shown earlier in the story rather than in the throes of action. There are a few things that could be removed (not sure where I was going with the Summoning Pin element, honestly). There are some things that could’ve been added (shouldn’t the Fairytale World been taken over ages ago?). This is one of the main reasons I tapped this story to get a complete overhaul in the form of Reloaded, where I plan to change everything that was wrong with the original story. As for all the magical swords/Device ripoffs, they were supposed to be based off of Lyrical Nanoha’s Devices, but that wasn’t made clear. I also put in references to Pretty Cure/Sailor Moon in regard to both Muse and Princess Presto, since they’re like the magical girls of the team. I do apologize for that ^^;

Also, being a Black woman myself, there’s gonna be more representation for BIPOC/women. It was a weak point in the original story (as the only other OC whose family gets prominence, Muse, is of Irish/Scottish descent), but I’m gonna rectify that. I’ve decided to include Power Paige in Reloaded, as well as a few other characters, too. I didn’t have a lot of confidence in describing appearances back then, much less scenes, and I realized recently that in trying to create a good descriptor for one of my OCs, I ended up unintentionally offending someone. And at the time of writing the original story, I had no idea that Red was Jewish (for context, I wrote the story when the original Woofster episodes aired, and didn’t follow the series for a while until 2016, when the last few episodes were airing). So, yeah, going forward, we’re not having any stereotypes for BIPOC, period! I’m planning on revising the first chapter of Darkness Rewrite to get rid of that descriptor for Ethan, because, like you said, it was a weird longer way to say someone had darker skin. As someone who interacts with people of various cultures, and makes sure to include that in my own stories, I admit, I dropped the ball here. But I’m gonna fix that! Names were also a big thing that I struggled with. I’ll correct the names for the families of the Super Readers’ families (AKA. The ones who weren’t properly named in the series) soon.

3. Character Development, Part 1: The Super Readers. As much as I like the Super Readers, I didn’t really give them proper character development, with Wonder Red and Super Why being the most egregious. I’d say the character that I (mostly) nailed in the original was Alpha Pig, while the character who got the worst end of the stick was Wonder Red, who was kinda reduced to a hotheaded Tsundere (and I did kinda keep up that energy in the recent entry, which I’m gonna correct in the following chapters!). Whyatt wasn’t terrible, but he was pretty blasé in comparison to the others—he was just there to be the leader and that’s it. Rewatching the series has given me a better idea on where to go with accurately portraying the characters, and of course, that’s gonna be accurately represented in the remaster.

Oh, and while I’m on the topic, the other villagers will get better character portrayals too. Little Boy Blue was demonized pretty early on, to where even I felt bad for him rereading the story.

4. Character Development, Part 2: The OCs. I hyped Muse up a lot during the introductory chapters, but nowadays I really dislike her character. Her character was very much underutilized and underdeveloped. I had more fun writing about the Super Readers and the history about her country rather than her, since they were way more interesting. Her personality is gonna get a complete overhaul in the remastered version, and she and the Evil Reader/Jackson will definitely get better character development and arcs that flesh out their characters.

On the topic of the Evil Reader/Jackson and Lexicon, their “redemption arcs” were rushed and admittedly terrible. Well, Lexicon’s was slightly better than Jackson’s, but I agree that justice wasn’t served to the Super Readers or the victims they hurt in the story proper. They can basically be summed up as “my past sucked and it’s the defining characteristic of who I am, but I’m discarding as of today, please forget the people I’ve killed!” Which I agree is a pretty toxic way of achieving redemption, and I recognize and apologize for that. I did do this on purpose to have them go through a “trial by fire” where they learn that forgiveness for their actions isn’t immediately earned—quite a few characters in the Gaiden series (and even in Chaos’ Revenge) do not forgive or let Jackson or Lexicon off the hook, but that’s not implied in the first story. That’ll definitely be fixed moving forward, as seen below.

I’m also very unsatisfied with Jackson/The Evil Reader’s character. I intended for him to be straight evil and then defeated, until I decided that I’d do a redemption arc for him, and did one that was ripped straight off of an anime. Or, more specifically, a movie. I was originally going for an Anakin Skywalker kind of thing, and I realized that I pulled it off badly. I remember being quite proud of his backstory when I wrote it. Now, though? Ugh. I’m going to be redoing his entire story, plus his history with his two best friends as well, in the remastered version.

Jeremiah, naturally, isn’t gonna be a Gary Stu like he was in the original fic. He does have his own flaws, which are shown later on down the road, but honestly should’ve been shown before the Gaiden series. He also should’ve stepped in way earlier, especially when the Evil Reader’s true nature as Chaos was starting to be revealed (which ties into how the darker themes are gonna be handled). All of this are gonna be handled appropriately in the remastered version.

5. Way less shock value. Some scenes (such as the Pig’s brother slapping him “to his senses” scene) were added for shock value. I know now that this is NOT good writing, especially when it goes against the characters’ canon natures. Plus, having a shocking scene after a shocking scene can really, REALLY get annoying after a while.

6. The Whyatt/Red romance. While it was one of the “selling points” of the original story, it was cheesy. It’s one of the things that I didn’t like about the original because it felt rushed (I also wrote a romance fic alongside this way back when, so I don’t really have an excuse!). I’ve already made like seven pages of notes for their romance in the remastered version, where their friendship is showcased as well, and how it’s not just one-sided on Red’s end.

7. Last but not least, the mature themes. The original SRBA got pretty gritty at times—from more physical violence, to the villains possessing/enslaving the villagers, to the horrors of war, to characters outright dying/getting killed, to the implications of genocide. And then, there’s the reveal in the Gaiden verse that Chaos is a predator. A lot of the Super Readers’ reactions/trauma to the events that happened in the original were pretty understated, I can concur with that. There are two chapters and a few moments that do address their worry, terror and fear about losing everything they hold dear…and that’s it. If I’m being totally honest, those aren’t enough. To say nothing of the crap they learned about the Evil Reader in chapter 17. That’ll get rectified in the remaster as well.

Now, I’ll finish this by explaining that I do write darker subjects in my writings. Those things do include, among other things, rape, SA, objectification/sexualization, suicide, violence (of several forms) and—if my Western series Blazin’ Trails is to go by—animal abuse, racism and slavery. I’ll make this abundantly clear: I don’t have a sick fascination with these things, and I do not advocate for any of these horrible things in real life. Sometimes, when I read these stories, when I see things that are just so awful, it literally runs through my head for hours, I write. I write it out to vent about it, to get my feelings out on paper, to break down why it’s wrong/cruel and most importantly, what can be done to end it and the suffering in people’s lives.

It’s why, when I write these themes or villains who eagerly commit these crimes and laugh, I do it with the mindset that they are the lowest of the low. When I write villains like this, I write with the mindset that these are horrible beings who a.) need no backstory to justify their horrible actions and b.) need to be eradicated in the most fitting way possible.

And in all of the stories that feature one or any of these things, it’s made 1000% crystal clear that none of these things, nor the people doing them, are morally right, excusable or justified/vindicated by history. I also stand by the fact that rape/sexual assault is never the victim’s fault, it’s 100% on the perpetrator, regardless of the circumstances. I have one rule when writing about characters who commit such acts, or who supports such acts: if there’s a character who believes that such things are right, they are swiftly dealt with, often violently. In fact, a lot of times, there’s a visceral reaction to those things and the characters are trying to eradicate those things (as well as the people doing it) from the world they live in. I certainly don’t let my villains (the ones who commit the aforementioned terrorism/sexualizing/etc.) get away with such actions.

I did address that yes, Lexicon and Jackson got away with the aforementioned genocide due to BS writing back when I was in school. In Reloaded, though? The difference is night and day—Jack and Mr. Beanstalk straight up kick their faces in for what they did to them and the kids, Jeremiah is much harsher in his beatdown of both of them and does reduce both of them to husks of their former selves when he steps in. And the Super Readers don’t speak to them for much of the story, even after it’s revealed that Chaos is the true villain, ’cause their earlier actions are still fresh in their minds and as such they don’t trust them at all (and rightfully so).

As for Chaos, he gets dealt with in the appropriate manner befitting a predator by Jeremiah when they first fought (which is gonna be explained in Darkness Rewrite when I get to it). But just know that the mature themes of this story will be handled in the appropriate way/explained better than they were in the original.

I think that’s everything that’s gonna be changed. If I find anything else that needs to be changed, I’ll be updating this accordingly! ^^

Thanks to everyone who let me know what was up, as it really helped me to get all of this out.

~iheartgod175

#pbs kids #super why #fanfic: Super Readers’ Biggest Adventure #remastered fics #fanfics #self criticism

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doorplays · 4 months ago

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Door Reviews: Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney - Justice for All (2002)

hello!!! it’s been a while

i’ve been feeling like writing again. i have a lot of WIPs for some reviews, some thoughts abt games, etc. just haven’t found the time and energy lately… but i find myself with some free time. so i’ll do another freeform ish review like last time, with the beginner’s guide. but now, it’s for the ace attorney sequel!!! i will be calling it aa2 from this point on

discussion abt what’s in the game

aa2 is the sequel to aa1, and it picks up months after the first game’s events. here, maya plays a more important role, as we go deeper into her nature as a spirit medium and her family ties. we get introduced to two new characters: pearl fey and franziska von karma. pearl is maya’s younger cousin, and franziska is edgeworth’s stepsister from when manfred von karma adopted him. and like last time, we get to explore four new cases, each with their own twists and turns.

it introduces a new mechanic: the psyche-locks. these appear in key moments of the game while speaking to some characters, and it is up to you to break them by presenting your magatama and disputing each statement the person you’re speaking to gives. it’s like a mini-trial before the main trial, and it’s a nice tool that helps with exposition while also giving proper gravity to the revelations involved.

game thoughts

the game is great!!! i love the cases (less so case 3, though it has its charm). the inclusion of the psyche-locks felt great. i love the way the characters were developed. phoenix wright is such a great character, and i loved maya in this game.

the cases felt intense at times, yet it never lost the levity that made it what it is. it really has a whimsical tone that’s over the top yet never loses sight of its heart. it’s a good sequel to me, building on the previous title while adding its own things. i like it a lot!!

game thoughts (SPOILERS)

maya really went through a LOT this game. i wanted to hug her a lot!! but despite everything she pushed on and kept cool in a way. i respect her a lot for that!!

pearly, despite her age, is very keen to help, and determined in her own way. she manages to channel maya easily, and that act was even crucial in getting information in the final case.

i liked how absolutely creative the cases were, though sometimes the answers are a bit of a reach. the third case felt contrived at times. well there’s a LOT wrong with the third case, but on first pass, i did enjoy my time with it.

i loved loved loved edgeworth’s return. my favorite boy. my blorbo. he’s changed now, and i think for the better. he went on a wholeass arc and imparted wisdom on his boyfriend, and even helped him get the guy. LOVE him.

and man. poor franziska. gifted child syndrome right there. i wish she finds time to relax. she’s such an interesting character, and i hope to see more of her soon.

parting thoughts

i really enjoyed aa2!!! i can’t wait to play more of aa3. i started it the other week, and the first case was so great. this is a great series that i wholeheartedly recommend.

Door Rates Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney - Justice for All: 5/5!

#door reviews #phoenix wright: ace attorney - justice for all #aa2 #jfa #phoenix wright #ace attorey

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sparklingmusicofstars · 2 years ago

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Hamefura first Bonus Short Story LN11 ( with Ronnie's POV )

Unfortunately, it was only in the chinese version so I had a hard time, because I'm just a beginner in chinese. So please tell me if you find any mistakes. Please enjoy it ! ^^

Side Story I

The endless violence from my father stopped suddenly. I, Ronnie Percy, looked up with a puzzled expression, and found a very beautiful woman looking at me with a worried expression.

My father was lying on the side of the house for some reason.

The woman told me that it was my father who staggered and bumped into it. It seemed that my father was as drunk as usual. I thought I was saved and breathed a sigh of relief Blood dripped from the corner of my mouth. It should be that when I was beaten by my father just now, the skin in my mouth was broken. The woman who saw this scene said :

"Are you okay ? Wipe this off."

She handed me a beautiful handkerchief. Maybe it was out of kindness, but how dare a person like me use such a beautiful thing, so I refused. Then I wiped the blood with the sleeve of my shirt. Before I know it, it was time to go to work.

"For a decent person like you, don't come to this kind of place again. Also, please tell to Dewey for me, and tell him by the way, to don't use money to subsidize the family in the future."

I told the woman, who might have known Dewey, warn my siblings to be careful about my father and then headed out to work. Even if I worry in my heart that my body has been be covered in bruises after being beaten and kicked, I don't know if I can still work today. My feet were so painful that I could only move forward slowly, after walking for a while.

"Mr. Ronnie."

Someone called me from behind. It's from the woman just now.

"You, how could you…"

"Because I want to talk to you again." She told me, I was so surprised.

"Hey, why did you come here ? It should be said that I have to go to work now, so I don't have time to chat with you." I clearly rejected her.

"However, I have asked your sister that your work is quite heavy physical work. I think your body may not be able to bear it. "

But the woman answered me like this.

"Tsk, she is so talkative… You are right, but I still have to go and ask if there is any work that can be done. Our family is very short of money. If I don't make money, even my younger siblings We can’t even afford food.”

"It means that you are just trying your luck. Then don't force yourself and rest well. Otherwise, the injury will not heal. If If you have to ask your boss to leave, let me go instead of you ?"

The woman who said so would not give in at all. And she also asked about Dewey, so I finally couldn't help but say "I hope Dewey doesn't mess with our family and live freely." Such sincere words.

This woman is really strange. I have never met such an inexplicable woman before. I thought to myself that the women in the Ministry of Magic are very strange. Then the strange woman went further :

"Leaving aside Mr. Ronnie's father, but you are definitely not useless. Literacy and good at arithmetic are indeed advantages. This will make it easier for you to survive in society. But this alone is not the value of a person. I think it is for the sake of younger brothers and sisters. Mr. Ronnie, who worked hard, is a very good person.”

First time someone said that to me. Because my father kept scolding me: "You are completely useless ." When I was confused and didn't know how to answer, a suspicious figure in black robe suddenly appeared and attacked the woman. In order to protect the woman, I ran around desperately for help… But I didn't catch up, and she came back directly after solving the problem on her own.

I obviously did nothing, but she thanked me very much. She complimented me again on how great I was, which made me feel good.

Later, thanks to her, I learned that Dewey respected me very much. And intends to "join hands with brothers to get rid of the current life of poverty". So I decided to go with him. I was trying to deal with my parents' problems, but when I got home, I found that everything had already been resolved, which made me feel discouraged.

Just today, my life has completely changed, and improved dramatically. I still can't accept the reality. When I was about to move, It seemed that my sister likes that strange woman very much. She said "I hope she can marry into our family." I heard my heart beat faster, but Dewey strongly denied it.

"Is that woman so powerful ?"

So I asked in private.

"She is the princess of the duke's family, the prince's fiancée." Dewey then told me the astonishing fact. The eldest daughter of the duke's family, the prince's fiancée, is an unattainable object. "How could such a noble person be here ?!" I yelled in surprise.

"How should I put it, she is like this. And she is a very nice person."

Dewey told me with a wry smile. An indescribable sense of trust can be seen from his expression. For her, who is out of reach, the vaguely sprouting emotion in my heart gradually fades. If only I had found out sooner. But if we moved near to the residence of the Ministry of Magic, I might have a chance to see her again from afar. Thinking so, I feel a little happy.

#hamefura #translation #LN11 #my next life as a villainess #Light novel #Katarina Claes #ronnie percy #bakarina #otome game no hametsu flag shika nai akuyaku reijou ni tensei shiteshimatta #bonus story

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tarot-by-e11e · 5 months ago

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hi elle, my initials are K.R and these are the emojis 😭❤️🥲💟🤍

im learning to love my voice more, my empathy and my creativity. ive always felt insecure about my voice and also felt blocked creatively due to being insecure about myself particularly how good i am. so im going to posy social media content publicly without being harsh and criticising myself and holding myself back from posting, from fear of failure. as for my empathy, ive felt that i often extend it to people who have wronged me. i also feel that my empathy can often be people-pleasing. so i am working on boundaries and standing up for myself, it's difficult.

hm... this is me trying by taylor swift? or any taylor swift song in general, since im not really a taylor swift fan

my biggest goal is to start posting on my youtube channel! that's my biggest goal :)

thank you for the ask game, i really appreciate it 🤍 i participated in a previous ask game and found it so helpful and accurate

Hi KR,

Thank you so much for participating in my new ask game.

It’s so nice to hear that you are putting in the work to achieve your goals~ Remember, baby steps, okay?

Don’t push yourself too hard and learn to accept that rest is productive. It’s okay to like just one song of an artist. You’re not required to like the whole album to appreciate a song.

Also, I hope you start posting on YouTube soon!! Good luck!!

These are the cards I pulled out for you: Knight of Swords, Judgement, 2 of Cups

With the first card, in order to achieve the goals that you want, you need to be assertive and focused on your game plan. Like in your YouTube channel, you need to make sure the video and sound quality are clear and appealing to the audience. You’ll need to learn about different things in cinematography and choosing the right background music. Also, researching and trying out different b rolls and making sure your equipment works properly, etc. So with the first card, you can’t be idle with your goals. You need to charge forward, do your research, and improve all the way. I’m not asking you to be a perfectionist, this card is just simply asking you to show up for yourself for your dreams to come true.

The next card calls you to keep track of your progress and always reevaluate which approach or strategy works well for you and which one needs to be improved or changed completely. To achieve the things that you want, you need to have a beginner mindset that's eager to explore and improve. It's best if you keep a notebook or journal to keep track of your efforts and be accountable with your actions. Always remember that, if you put 1% effort everyday, that's equivalent to 37% of progress in a whole year later.

Finally the last card you calls for you to be open for collaborations and create meaningful connections. Creating a channel means you'll need to learn your own way of building an online community and learn how to best create content in your own unique way. With this one, you're encourage to learn and partner with established creators and learn what they are willing to teach you. Be open to work with people for the sake of experience. Going about your channel on your own feels like a such a heavy burden on you. So, if you can establish your own team to help you with your channel, that's even better.

This is as far as I could interpret for your reading. Thank you so much for being my participant!

Feel free to tip me in my Buy me a Coffee account (to show support) ahehe [Not required, but most grateful if you did]~ (This reading is for entertainment purposes only)

#divination #ask game #ask #answered #tarot #tarot reading #tarotcommunity

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bluepenguinstories · 1 year ago

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You're Not Smarter Just Because You're High

Well, I’ve figured it out; connected the dots. It all lines up. The skills, their names, what they do… it all goes back to what they had to go through. It’s about alienation, and the struggle to be an idealist when the each half of the world would like to see you dead. The flies buzzing around, frightening at first, become plums once in your stomach.

I should know that feeling very well. That pit. If you look at this date, at this time, in this location it all lines up like a colony of ants out on a mission. I’ve been too much of a shut-in lately to have my head in the clouds. Call this self-centered, but I think I understand others better now. At least better than when I was critically anxious. I still don’t know about their intentions. People are scary, even when I understand then (if I do at all) but this isn’t a rally cry, or a call for help. The call is coming from inside the house.

Even in my head, it’s all about the day-to-day. Hours better spent, and always worse spent. It’s been at least a decade since I’ve had any ambition. What does it mean to have brown hair? It is so wrong to have it? I come from a community fractured like my face from all the times I picked at pimples. My dreams are best experienced when I fall asleep when I was awake, I used to forget I was in reality. Others now say, “you give up too easily.” But the truth is only a matter of never able to handle rejection, the slightest criticism, failure, confrontation. Yet I remain self-critical because deep down I’m aware that it’s necessary to have someone tell me my downsides. I just don’t want it to be someone other than me. In this dim, radiated light, it’s because if someone else says what I believe about myself, it will confirm my fears. Yet consciously, I know it’s not personal. Not like that. It just permeates my life, like expired lunch meat in a fridge.

But then, that’s all beginner material. That’s not the advanced course. Anybody can come to conclusions like that. It doesn’t reflect my values. Maybe it’s that what I value I don’t put into practice until it starts to look like I don’t value anything. Life is a constant struggle between being able to survive and sacrificing what I value. Yes, I know part of it is the economic system I live under but then I really wonder: is the problem also me? Is it because of my broken mind that I struggle to survive? Sometimes it becomes hard to tell how to act. Should I be the shivering puppy in the rain? No, even better, I can live invisible once more. I can cancel myself out. At least that’s how I see it. But I also know the meaning between wanting love and wanting intimacy. But how do you tell the one you love that you want nothing? That is not to say I am without but what I want is the very thing that is nothing. Nothing is everything to me.

Or at least it must be for someone. So did I do it? Did I crack the code? There were newspaper clippings on my great-grandmother’s floor. She always warned me about reading books for devil worship but she never prepared me for the fact that I just don’t like baseball. It all must have some deeper meaning…gender roles, or expectations and that comes another issue of mine: meeting the expectations of others. When medical professionals ask me if I’m pregnant or currently planning to be I have to tell them that I just can’t deliver. I didn’t put on tutus or anything. I am still not the most feminine – I wear hoodies. So how else was my great-grandmother to know? And if she saw the signs would she call me gay? But over time maybe I would have said, “yes, but not in the direction you’re thinking of.” That would have been a good bonding experience. But I just could never bring myself to tell her.

(Actually, that’s a lie, too, as I couldn’t bring myself to tell her because I didn’t even fully grasp that about myself either. Even if I was as bold as I was lamenting I wasn’t, I still couldn’t tell her. That’s just the fact. Also, I probably wouldn’t have even cared enough to tell her had I known, since I have never been close with my relatives to begin with. Actually, that’s a partial lie, too. I liked some relatives more than others and were closer with some than others.)

Is that it? Is that truly the root to everything? Is this some philosophical breakthrough? Freud would say so. Jung would snort coke off my back (allegedly). How should I know where I am and where the universe resides? I didn’t take that class. I didn’t reveal any hidden truths, I just want to make it sound like I did.

#poem #poetry #writing #this was just written one night when I was depressed #its more of a vent than anything resembling a poem #prose #really its stream of conscious depression

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acasestudyofaria · 1 year ago

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✅ 32/52 recap + reflect

i don’t have much to say about this week because i spent more time doing than thinking about things and my working memory is a tad bit deficient BUT here’s one thing i took away from week 32:

embrace imperfection and difficulty in doing new things - you finding it difficult is not a sign to back away, it’s proof you’re trying

as a child, things came very easily to me, esp when i was interested in it, so i relied on what i would call beginner’s luck to get me through a lot of things growing up. i feel like i breezed through the majority of my life unaware of how to actually do certain things (like studying, and i can’t tell if that’s a blessing or a curse). now that i’m trying to be more aware and present in what i do, the reality hit me like a sack of bricks. i can find things difficult. my natural response was to resist facing the difficulty and run away from my responsibilities, which set me back a thousand steps.

this week, i pushed myself to do more difficult things (that ideal me would do), esp when i really didn’t feel like doing them.

my findings: difficult things became less difficult the more i attempted to do them, or at least, i was less resistant to doing them.

things that helped me “not think, just do”:

🍄 say bismillah - this is literally a cheat code. you’re unstoppable with the creator of the heavens and the Earth on your side. all He has to do is say be, and it is. ok bismillah, letsgooo!

🍄 set a timer - switching my study goals from content-oriented tasks to time-oriented ones helped me build momentum too. i didn’t always manage to finish studying the content i wanted to, but by the end of the day, i had finished at least half of it instead of only having thought about doing it.

🍄 visualise doing the thing - i screened mini “spoiler alert” reels in my head, showing myself how in 30mins, i would’ve completed a certain task. the resistance to it dramatically decreased because the “future footage” made me see the task for what it actually was: something i could definitely do and NOT a threat to my well-being.

🍄 set intentions and systems around your goals - i started the week off telling myself i would finish one biochem topic a day. it didn’t work and i kept berating myself for it. two days ago, i told myself i would commit to increasing my biochemistry knowledge base a little every day. i switched my goals to timeblocks instead of topics and that system increased my productivity. even when i wasn’t able to complete an entire topic, i had taken steps towards improving my knowledge base, AND achieved my goal of x study timeblocks.

🍄 give yourself a “gold star” once you complete a task - for me, posting my todaystodos updates on my story and seeing the green ticks (or the absence thereof) gave me just enough dopamine to push myself more the next day. but i also rewarded myself w cake, or talking to my brother, or today, watching an episode of Strange Planet. find something that works for you and DO NOT pre-reward (it doesn’t work as effectively).

🍄 be your loudest cheerleader too - we’re usually our worst critics, and that’s okay (as long as we stay constructive) but we have to cheer ourselves on too. how would you talk to a friend or a sibling? my brother rerouted a lot of my negative thoughts this week, and once i started talking to myself the same way, it changed how i approached the things i needed to do - again, it dramatically decreased the resistance.

🍄 treat yourself w compassion even if you fail to meet your own expectations - because we will sometimes. and that’s okay. we do better next time. cultivate a growth mindset. there are no failures in this garden, just unsuccessful experiments that leave more soil for new flowers to be planted. and it shows you what not to do with the next attempt. it’s trial and error until it works out, loves.

happy monday! <><3

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beazt · 2 years ago

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second BJJ class done.

I learned the name of the takedown we learned on Monday, it was called a near fall takedown. can’t find any videos of it, but I found a video that’s pretty close to one of the variations we did

I also did better at the warm ups today than I did Monday, though I was actually doing them correctly this time around so they were harder and I wasn’t able to do as many reps. thankfully, my instructor doesn’t call me out for not doing all the reps. my favorite warm up we do is called the caterpillar. you start standing up with your legs straight and use your hands to walk yourself down past push up position then tip toe your way back up.

today wasn’t a takedown day (booooo! I wanna throw people around EVERY day). we worked on passing open guard using bullfighter/toreando pass, transition to knee on belly which we worked on for a while and I was abysmal at, and then transitioning to side control from knee on belly. side control my fucking beloved. my legs are too short to do a proper knee on belly on bigger folks.

got absolutely smashed in our “stay on top/escape bottom” drills starting in side control. When my partner had me in side control I couldn’t do SHIT. I almost got out once. good enough for me. but damn, she’s strong. I had an equally hard time staying on top cause she would just roll me over immediately when I was in side control and I didn’t have time to change position. I was actually doing better against the more advanced guy. this girl is just wicked strong and I fear her. she also has hyper mobile joints so some submissions don’t work on her lmfao she’s a beast. respect.

I also got to roll with the instructor a couple times, well really we were movement drilling. i did well.

I didn’t do any open rolling today again bc I still don’t know any submissions or escapes so im not going to just jump in and get smashed yet. I probably should but im still too scared lmao. im the most beginner person in the class and im content just watching the open rolling tbh

BJJ is allowing me to come to terms with vulnerability head on. I’m not used to sticking with something that I feel bad at, normally I can’t stand it. I’m used to being unnaturally good for a beginner at stuff, or otherwise giving it up right away. But BJJ is pushing me. I can’t do all the warmups that we do before we start, even. But I put forth my best effort and yeah even though I feel a little insecure about not being great at it, my classmates and instructor are all very supportive. I love the atmosphere.

I’m actually not getting discouraged, I’m excited to be able to learn in a supportive environment. And _that_ is major growth for me. I don’t know how many times I’ve quit stuff I was really excited about because I didn’t meet my expectations, even in really supportive environments. The few things I have stuck through, I went through mental agony over not meeting my expectations.

I guess it helped that I went into this with low expectations for myself. Which is another sign of major growth. Im the king of unreasonable expectations for myself, just ask anyone who knows me well. I’m really grateful BJJ has been introduced into my life and it’s helping me in ways I didn’t even expect.

#lous clues #Lou rolls

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bluemoonfantasiesiii · 2 years ago

Note

Rubedo's words made her eyes grow wide with much joy "really~?! Then you will love to see the green rain forest and the big gold desert~! I believe the colourful birds and frogs there will make you feel happy too~!" She exclaimed with big smile "if we meet my mama~, we can ask her to teach us of the desert songs too to call the foxes over there~" Lily said with much happiness, she wanted Ruby to have a mama too, so she wished Ruby would love her mother 'Rosa' and wished that 'she' would truly take care of them both as her own children.

Vincent chuckled at the two's argument before he patted Nigredo's shoulder "I believe it might be okay, if you only used the basic rules as a start, I guess. As long as you don't teach me something off limits- being a beginner myself - I think it should be fine. And of course Albedo would know about those too. Would that be fine for you both?" he asked but still wonder if it really would be fine with the rules that made by the Knights to keep things under control.

“I can’t wait to see it!” Rubedo said. “All the pretty flowers and fungi! I wonder what it would feel like to burrow in the sand.”

Albedo heaved a sigh. “As long as you keep your lessons secret and out of the city’s walls, I suppose I can look the other way. And we absolutely can’t teach him… Well…”

“Oh, of course not,” Nigredo agreed. “It’s best if that practice dies with us.”

#moon answers shit #vincent anon #rhinesons au

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kafus · 2 years ago

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beginner’s guide to the indie web

“i miss the old internet” “we’ll never have websites like the ones from the 90s and early 2000s ever again” “i’m tired of social media but there’s nowhere to go”

HOLD ON!

personal websites and indie web development still very much exist! it may be out of the way to access and may not be the default internet experience anymore, but if you want to look and read through someone’s personally crafted site, or even make your own, you can still do it! here’s how:

use NEOCITIES! neocities has a built in search and browse tools to let you discover websites, and most importantly, lets you build your own website from scratch for free! (there are other ways to host websites for free, but neocities is a really good hub for beginners!)

need help getting started with coding your website? sadgrl online has a section on her website dedicated to providing resources for newbie webmasters!

HTML (HyperText Markup Language) and CSS (Cascading Style Sheets) are the core of what all websites are built on. many websites also use JS (JavaScript) to add interactive elements to their pages. w3schools is a useful directory of quick reference for pretty much every HTML/CSS/JS topic you can think of.

there is also this well written and lengthy guide on dragonfly cave that will put you step by step through the basics of HTML/CSS (what webpages are made from), if that’s your sort of thing!

stack overflow is every programmer’s hub for asking questions and getting help, so if you’re struggling with getting something to look how you want or can’t fix a bug, you may be able to get your answer here! you can even ask if no one’s asked the same question before.

websites like codepen and jsfiddle let you test HTML/CSS/JS in your browser as you tinker with small edits and bugfixing.

want to find indie websites outside the scope of neocities? use the search engine marginalia to find results you actually want that google won’t show you!

you can also use directory sites like yesterweb’s link section to find websites in all sorts of places.

if you are going to browse the indie web or make your own website, i also have some more personal tips as a webmaster myself (i am not an expert and i am just a small hobbyist, so take me with a grain of salt!)

if you are making your own site:

get expressive! truly make whatever you want! customize your corner of the internet to your heart’s content! you have left the constrains of social media where every page looks the same. you have no character limit, image limit, or design limit. want to make an entire page or even a whole website dedicated to your one niche interest that no one seems to be into but you? go for it! want to keep a public journal where you can express your thoughts without worry? do it! want to keep an art gallery that looks exactly how you want? heck yeah! you are free now! you will enjoy the indie web so much more if you actually use it for the things you can’t do on websites like twitter, instead of just using it as a carrd bio alternative or a place to dump nostalgic geocities gifs.

don’t overwhelm yourself! if you’ve never worked with HTML/CSS or JS before, it may look really intimidating. start slow, use some guides, and don’t bite off more than you can chew. even if your site doesn’t look how you want quite yet, be proud of your work! you’re learning a skill that most people don’t have or care to have, and that’s pretty cool.

keep a personal copy of your website downloaded to your computer and don’t just edit it on neocities (or your host of choice) and call it a day. if for some reason your host were to ever go down, you would lose all your hard work! and besides, by editing locally and offline, you can use editors like vscode (very robust) or notepad++ (on the simpler side), which have more features and is more intuitive than editing a site in-browser.

you can use ctrl+shift+i on most browsers to inspect the HTML/CSS and other components of the website you’re currently viewing. it’ll even notify you of errors! this is useful for bugfixing your own site if you have a problem, as well as looking at the code of sites you like and learning from it. don’t use this to steal other people’s code! it would be like art theft to just copy/paste an entire website layout. learn, don’t steal.

don’t hotlink images from other sites, unless the resource you’re taking from says it’s okay! it’s common courtesy to download images and host them on your own site instead of linking to someone else’s site to display them. by hotlinking, every time someone views your site, you’re taking up someone else’s bandwidth.

if you want to make your website easily editable in the future (or even for it to have multiple themes), you will find it useful to not use inline CSS (putting CSS in your HTML document, which holds your website’s content) and instead put it in a separate CSS file. this way, you can also use the same theme for multiple pages on your site by simply linking the CSS file to it. if this sounds overwhelming or foreign to you, don’t sweat it, but if you are interested in the difference between inline CSS and using separate stylesheets, w3schools has a useful, quick guide on the subject.

visit other people’s sites sometimes! you may gain new ideas or find links to more cool websites or resources just by browsing.

if you are browsing sites:

if the page you’re viewing has a guestbook or cbox and you enjoyed looking at the site, leave a comment! there is nothing better as a webmaster than for someone to take the time to even just say “love your site” in their guestbook.

that being said, if there’s something on a website you don’t like, simply move on to something else and don’t leave hate comments. this should be self explanatory, but it is really not the norm to start discourse in indie web spaces, and you will likely not even be responded to. it’s not worth it when you could be spending your time on stuff you love somewhere else.

take your time! indie web doesn’t prioritize fast content consumption the way social media does. you’ll get a lot more out of indie websites if you really read what’s in front of you, or take a little while to notice the details in someone’s art gallery instead of just moving on to the next thing. the person who put labor into presenting this information to you would also love to know that someone is truly looking and listening.

explore! by clicking links on a website, it’s easy to go down rabbitholes of more and more websites that you can get lost in for hours.

seeking out fansites or pages for the stuff you love is great and fulfilling, but reading someone’s site about a topic you’ve never even heard of before can be fun, too. i encourage you to branch out and really look for all the indie web has to offer.

i hope this post helps you get started with using and browsing the indie web! feel free to shoot me an ask if you have any questions or want any advice. <3

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writerkimmieahyoungieyurawr · 3 years ago

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Ch 10: Explanation

Credits to @midnightdancingsol for helping with the editing

You decide to move to the sofa and Irene takes a seat beside you. Her head rests on your shoulder while you try to grasp the situation. “I’m sorry oppa. I just wasn’t sure how you would react. It seemed like you really cared for Irene from this world and I didn't want to be treated differently.”

You sigh and nod. “Yeah, I can understand why you did what you did. But what did you mean by the only reason why you and Irene from this world merged is because your feelings were aligned?’

She adjusts herself from your shoulder and faced you. “Well while I was being transferred here I managed to spend some time with the Hera and the Queen. They gave me some insight into this whole situation.”

“Apparently In:Verse is actually another world which the goddesses made into a digital world because a dark force was beginning to develop. So, the goddesses decided this way, heroes can inhibit the world and fight the dark force. No one who was digitized will be harmed but approximately 75% of the NPCs here are real people who just live here. The reason why you were chosen to be brought here is despite all the shit talk, they believed that you were capable of bringing emotion into this world that has been ruined by war and scarcity. The reason why the other you didn’t level up was because he couldn’t form a bond with the other Irene which can be called love. So if you want to go and try to get the unique skill I think both you and Jennie can achieve them.”

You nod and bring Irene to your lap so you can hug her waist. “So I want to explain the whole thing about you being in love with me. I still can’t quite grasp it but this is a very different you.”

She blushes and giggles in a way you didn’t expect. “Well...oppa. It was when I first met you. But before i had a chance to confess, you started dating Yura. I thought you were taken so I held myself back because I didn’t want to be the kind of girl that stole someone else’s man. But I think six months after you dated Yura, I heard that apparently you were building a harem. When I heard that I got so happy because I didn't care, I was willing to share you with everyone else. But that was also when we started getting bigger and busier and by the time I got to see you again, Yeri was confessing to you.”

She sighed as she said that but you kissed her cheek to comfort her. “ So I acted like the worst person around you because I felt guilty of my feelings since Yeri was also one of your lovers. But I can’t believe that my first actual time having sex was you making me squirt while being on all fours.”

You turned her face to yours showing a surprised face. “Wait your first time? What about all those men you dated?”

She blushes and nods. “ Well those were all lies that I told the girls. Didn’t you find it weird that Dispatch never had any dirt on me despite me being a huge slut?”

Now that you think about it, she’s never had any scandal involving boys. “You sly little girl. But what will you do when we eventually bring Yeri here?”

She leans into your chest. “I’ll just have to swallow my pride cause I'm never letting you go ever again.”

You caressed her hair and nodded. “Well in that case shall we g-”

Irene interrupts you and puts a finger on your lips. In the silence, you heard the sound of moans behind you and you peeked and saw that Jennie was in the midst of having sex with her girls. She was in the middle of what seems like a circle of fucking where everyone was pleasuring the person in front of them while getting pleasured.

“Well maybe we should sneak out and have some private time together too,” you say softly as Irene nods. You both quietly walk out of the house into the streets of the town. You hold Irene’s hand as you walk down the street and Irene leans close to you. “Irene, just wondering, why are the streets so empty?”

“Well yeobo, this is a beginner town so there aren’t many people left here. Speaking of which, we also should start thinking of a business plan to generate money since there is a limit on how much money can be brought in from the real world.”

You nod at Irene’s suggestion. You’ve already read about this and had some thoughts but you’re hesitant. Irene, probably sensing this, poked your cheek and pointed to a cafe nearby. “Want to take a break and share your mind?”

You nod. “Sure.” You both headed to a table outside of the cafe. An elf lady came to greet you and take your order. After glancing at the simple menu, you ordered a coffee and Irene ordered a tea. “So what’s on your mind? You seem hesitant.“

You sighed as you took a sip. “Well, I mean, I have thought of some ideas but I don't know if I can go through with them now that I know more and more of you girls will come from the other world and it isn’t just girls from this world. “

Irene gives a thoughtful nod while she sips on her tea. “I can’t say this for everyone but i’ll do anything for you yeobo. Even if it means I have to offer my body.”

You look at her and see the resolve in her eyes. “I don’t know. I feel like i can give all you girls an opportunity to live normal-”

She puts her lips against yours. “Well we can’t live any lives here if we are broke.”

You knew that Irene had always been blunt but that statement still caught you off guard. “W-well I was thinking we could make an entire entertainment area. The entertainment in this world seems pretty lackluster since everyone is busy with work and rebuilding and I thought we could take advantage of it.”

She just laughs and smiles. “You do know I’ve been working as an Idol for seven years now. I can work a few more and hey, hopefully there won’t be the typical stereotypes. Maybe we can change it so we can have more freedom: I've always wanted to do a gravure shoot like the Japanese idols.”

You can only smile at her excitement and nod. “Though, I think we might need to start at the bottom with a more crude approach.“ You finish your coffee. “We might have to start a brothel just to get enough funds to produce anything.”

Irene nods and finishes up her tea as well. “I know, that's why I said I'd do anything you need. Even if it means having to offer my body.”

You stretch and hug her. “Shall we head out? I want to try to level up and see if we can actually achieve it.”

You grin and hold her hand and think of a horse and it appeared next to the both of you. “I think we need to go slightly further to be able to level up.” You got up first and then helped Irene onto the horse as well before riding out of the town.

#irene smut #au story #in:verse

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toransuretaa · 2 years ago

Text

The Neighbour in Room 203 Disappeared Leaving a Key Behind Drama CD (2/5)

Warning: R18 Drama CD & Yandere shit

Track 2: Stalker

**Doorbell rings**

Kurama: “Yes. Oh, it’s miss neighbour. I’m opening it now.”

**Door opens**

Kurama: “Is there something?”

**Rustling of a paper bag**

Kurama: “A box of cakes?*”

Kurama: “Huh this is? Did I do something?”

**Tapping**

Kurama: “What? You’re moving out? That’s a really sudden notice. And here I thought we were finally starting to get along. That’s really too bad.”

Kurama: “Oh well, I guess it can’t be helped. You have your own life after all.”

Kurama: “Then, shall we drink some tea together as a last thing? I’m good at making tea. And just a while back, I was gifted my favourite tea in my letter box from Mr. Stalker.”

Kurama: “Huh? I mean, since I received it already, it would be a waste right?”

Kurama: “Besides, it’s something mr. stalker did their best to think through for me. Ehehehe.”

Kurama: “Eeeh. Isn’t it fine miss neighbour? You’re free today anyway righ?”

Kurama: “Come on come on”

Kurama: “What’s wrong?”

**Struggle**

Kurama: “Ahahahaha.”

Kurama: “I know.”

**Shove. Door closes**

Kurama: “I know that you’re my stalker. So, hurry up and put off your shoes.”

Kurama: “Ah leave the box of cakes there. I’ll open it later.”

Kurama: “I’ts okay it’s okay. Come on come on.”

**Put off shoes**

Kurama: “Alright alright, this way this way.”

**Goes inside**

Kurama: “Now, miss stalker, how does it feel to enter the room of the guy you always yearned for?”

Kurama: “Oh was it too dark? The black-out curtains are closed after all. I’ll turn on the lights for you~”

Kurama: “Ah. That face right now is really good.”

**Takes picture**

Kurama: “Heh. Let’s print this out too later on and hang it over there. I guess I’ll be running out of ink again.”

Kurama: “What’s that you ask? It’s a photo. Photography is my hobby. I love taking photos during trips. You also at least have a photo of me right?”

Kurama: “Eeeeeeh you don’t have one? If you’re gonna stalk someone you’ve got to at least take their picture first. You must be a beginner in stalking.”

**Walks over**

Kurama: “Hahaha cute. That kind of face is cute too.”

Kurama: “Heh. You know, photos are done like this...”

**Takes picture**

Kurama: “Heh. That’s our first picture together.”

Kurama: “Hahaha. I would’ve liked a cuter expression more.”

**Push**

Kurama: “Woah.”

**You run away and topple something over**

Kurama: “How mean.”

Kurama: “What is that you say? Take a closer look.”

Kurama: “That’s right. It’s what they call a Dutch wife. I had it made after you. Don't you think it's well made? Look, her eyes, for example, look really just like yours!"

Kurama: "From making the model to the hair colour and even the shape of her face. Isn't she perfect? Oh even her height and weight are the same. The technology nowadays is amazing. It’s been a while since I’ve spent a large sum of money on myself."

Kurama: “Oh I also have that doll on the bed you know.”

**Fumbling**

Kurama: “That doll is wearing your old clothes. The ones you threw away recently.”

Kurama: “You can still use them so it’d be such a waste. I fixed the torn parts neatly, so look: doesn’t it look pretty?”

Kurama: “Ohh. What a nice expression.”

**Takes pictures**

Kurama: “Oh hey hey don’t run away.”

**Footsteps**

Kurama: “There you go.”

Kurama: “Caught you.”

**Sniffs**

Kurama: “What a nice scent. Is it shampoo I wonder.”

**Sniffs**

Kurama: “It’ll makes me go hard.”

Kurama: “Oh no you shouldn’t do that. You’ll bother the neighbours if you scream. The landlord will also worry, so that’d be inpolite. Hmmm, but that muffled voice is also cute.”

Kurama: “Ah sorry. As expected, I got hard.”

Kurama: “Can you tell it’s hitting your hips?”

**Struggle**

Kurama: “Ah. Ehe. Even though there’s no way you’d win against a guy’s strength. You’re really cute when you become desperate. So cute it makes me want to gobble you up.”

**Licks**

Kurama: “Shall I start by eating your cute ear?”

**Assaults Licks ear and giggles**

Kurama: “Your muffled cries... so good. But I kinda want to hear your voice filled with pleasure.”

**Licks**

Kurama: “Hm. Are you about to pass out. I guess I could just kill you like this. And afer that I’ll embalm you and keep you pretty. I’m not really good at things like that, but there are enough ways to do it.”

Kurama: “Like a real Dutch wife. Ehehehehe that sounds like a good plan.”

**Struggles**

Kurama: “Is that so? That’s a little disappointing. I’m not really into doing things you don’t like. I’ll let go of your hand, but making too much of a ruckus is a no-no okay?”

Kurama: “Here you go.”

Kurama: “What? What’s wrong? Is there something scary? Getting touched by someone you like should make you happy right? After all, if I was in your position I’d be happy. Hahaha.”

Kurama: “Hmm? You don’t know me even though you’re my stalker? Geez, if you’re gonna follow someone around you’ve gotta do your research on them. I’m Kurama Nagito, the person on your mind and your neighbour. You loved me so much that you stalked me right? ”

Kurama: “I do know you very well. Like how you adjust the time you leave for work just to see me. Or how you leave letters for me inside my letter box. How you go through the trash I’ve thrown away. Or how you’ve written about me a lot in your diary.”

Kurama: “Ah. Also how you become red as you imagine being embraced by me. Hehehe. I know you reaaaally well you know.”

**Sloppy sounds**

Kurama: “Ah it’s so warm inside your mouth.”

Kurama: “C’mon, suck on my fingers.”

Kurama: “I already know you masturbated while thinking of me.”

Kurama: “C’mon. Try to suck on my fingers as if they’re my thing.”

Kurama: “Huh? You can’t? Don’t pull back your tongue now. Geez you’re so dishonest.”

Kurama: “Well then, I’ll violate the insides of your mouth for you.”

Kurama: “It’ll hurt if you bite, so you can’t bite okay?”

**Sloppy sounds**

Kurama: “Ah that’s really sexy. I’ll let you suck the real thing in a bit so you can look forward to that.”

**Sloppy sounds**

Kurama: “How did the me in your imagination embrace you? Was he kind? Or was he a bit mean? Hey what was the setting? Was it a bit forceful like this? Or were we maybe lovers inside your imagination?”

Kurama: “Ah. It really turns me on.”

Kurama: “I’m already so excited it hurts.”

Kurama: “Should I start rubbing?”

**Zipper and more sloppy sounds**

Kurama: “Ah you’re skin is so smooth. Is this what they call skin as white as snow?**”

Kurama: “There we go. Oh this underwear, isn’t it the one you bought just recently? The popular one shaped like a flower. So cute. If I were a girl I’d also want to wear something like that.”

Kurama: “There aren’t any cute guy’s underwear like that so it’s a bit lonely.”

**Sloppy sounds**

Kurama: “Ah. You’re butt also has a nice shape. Shall I rub against here?”

**Sloppy sounds and moaning intensifies**

Kurama: “The real thing feels good. Much better than in my imaginations.”

Kurama: “Gotta let it out once or else I don’t think I’ll last that long after this.”

Kurama: “I’m sorry. I have no idea what you’re saying. Maybe I would’ve known if I were an esper.”

Kurama: “Your butt or your back. Hmmm. Which do you prefer? Oh right you can’t talk. Sorry sorry.”

Kurama: “I guess it doesn’t matte either way.”

**Sloppy sounds and moaning intensifies x2**

Kurama: “Ah, I’m gonna cum. I can’t anymore.”

Kurama: “I’m gonna shoot it out so make sure to catch it with your body okay?”

**Sloppy sounds and moaning intensifies x3**

**>////<**

**Heavy panting**

Kurama: “Ah that felt good.”

Kurama: “I let out a lot on your back ahahaha. It’s so slimy.”

Kurama: “Of course it’s not revenge or something like that. I was happy from the bottom of my heart to get stalked by you, you know? Besides, I got super exicted. Cause even the timid cutie who’s always sitting in front of me can love me so passionately. I’ve been looking at you for a pretty long time now. I was really happy that my feelings were reciprocated you know?”

Kurama: “Huh? You didn’t notice? That’s so sad. The train to work you used to take from your old place before this. I’ve been near you practically every day. So you just never noticed.”

Kurama: “Ah I knew it. I kind of supsected it bit it’s still a bit of a shock. It’s true that I wore a face mask and black glasses that aren’t these. And when I thought I didn’t really see you for a bit you moved away on your own accord without a word and changed your route. That’s why, I searched you up and moved in here.”

Kurama: “The real neighbour was a really kind person, so I think they’re having a happy life with someone else now.”

**Kisses**

Kurama: “I had my eyes on you on a pretty early stage you know. You’re cute and even like this, no matter how you appeared you seemed to make someone happy. Like a hidden gem that shines once you find it. I watched you all this time with these kind of eyes.”

**Kisses**

Kurama: “But, kidnapping someone against their will goes against my policy. I find that a bit too pitiful, so I planned to reel you in only if you showed interest in me.”

Kurama: “That’s how it went with the other girls until now too.”

(T/N: noooooo whyyyyyyy T-T)

Kurama: “But even though I watched and watched and watched you, you’d never notice. And you know what happened next? I’m the one who fell for you.”

Kurama: “I was planning to get closer to you normally, but then you move away.”

Kurama: “That was such a shock.”

Kurama: “So, I tailed you.”

Kurama: “And then. You... hehehehe. You started stalking me. Ahahaha. I couldn’t help but be delighted.”

Kurama: “I’m used to following people around through work, but it’s really fun to be the one getting followed. I wonder if everyone felt this excitement too. Hehehe.”

Kurama: “I was waiting in this room the whole time you know. Waiting for you to break in. But you just stared at me, platonically, like an unrequited love that went just a bit too far.”

Kurama: “I was anticipating for you to approach me, but no development seemed to be made like this. And when I went hmmmmm, you said you were moving out again.”

Kurama: ”I thought, certainly you didn’t find someone else you like right?”

**Strangling sounds**

Kurama: “Hey, that’s really sad. Was I not enough? Even though you loved me to the point of stalking me? It was such a shock I thought I’d faint.”

Kurama: “I won’t forgive you if you move out. Cause you already belong to me.”

Kurama: “Hey, why did you think about something like moving out?”

**Struggle**

Kurama: “Oh. Oooh. Eeeeh. That’s a new pattern, or however you call it. At the very least, that’s a reason I’ve never heard before. Ahahaha you’re really interesting. A stalker who felt too bad for their subject who seems too nice and decided to go away. No way. Normally you’d like them even more. You’d think they accepted you. You’re really such a normal person. You’re not fit for stalking.”

Kurama: “If the other party has accepted you you’ve gotta take the opportunity. Oh well, it’s all good if you haven’t found another guy.”

**Stretches**

Kurama: “We’re face-to-face.”

Kurama: “Wow you’re face is completely white.”

Kurama: “I’ll paint it peach color right now so let’s kiss first. Chuu-”

**Struggles**

Kurama: “You like me right? C’mon, kiss.”

**Struggles**

Kurama: “You don’t like me? Ah. Did I mishear that? Huh? I cleaned my ears just yesterday.”

**Struggles**

Kurama: “Ah you really don’t like me anymore? That’s so mean. I’m getting dizzy again from the shock.”

Kurama: “I feel like crying. Even though I like you so much.”

Kurama: “Then, I guess I should kill you while you still have some feelings for me. If you start going I don’t wanna I don’t wanna from now on and start hating me, I’ll become even more sad.”

Kurama: “Yes, that’s a good idea.”

**Struggles**

Kurama: “Don’t worry it doesn’t hurt and isn’t scary. It’s just like falling asleep and never waking up, that’s all. I’m really good at that. And then I’ll embalm you after all and preserve you prettily. I’ll treasure you together with my precious memories with you. ”

Kurama: “Hm. What was a lie?”

Kurama: “Oh. I’m so glad!”

**Hugs**

Kurama: “I knew it. You do like me. Ah I’m relieved. I’m so relieved.”

Kurama: “But you know. Next time you say something like that I’ll really start crying.”

Kurama: “Don’t say such sad things anymore okay?”

Kurama: “Then if you like me... you can kiss me right?”

Kurama: “I’ll close my eyes for you since you’re a pure girl.”

Kurama: “Oh and make sure to put in your tongue. And sloppily entangle it with mine, tell me you love me by seeking for me.

**Kissing sounds**

Kurama: “More properly.”

**Kissing sounds**

Kurama: “This is not enough. C’mon like this.”

**Kissing intesifies**

Kurama: “We must intensely yearn for eachother, okay?.”

Kurama: “That expression is cute too. The expression of our first kiss.”

**Takes picture”

Kurama: “Woaah. Cute! Look! You’re making a really good face. Isn’t this complicated expression amazing?”

Kurama: “An expression of bewilderment and pleasure are mixed together. It’s the best.”

Kurama: “Hey, did your kiss with me feel good?”

**Giggles**

Kurama: “I also really liked my kiss with you. To the point it makes me want to kiss you even more. It really feels like a bliss.”

Kurama: “Well then. Show me your cute body.”

Kurama: “C’mon take it off. Erotically. Like you’re a stripper.”

Kurama: “Ah! One sec. W-w-w-wait. Wait! Eh HD camera... Eeeh camera... Hmmm... huh where is it? Ehhhh, oh this. Oh not it. Oh here! Ahaha, it looks like a camera so it’s hard to distinguish.

**Sound of a rotating device**

Kurama: “Ah looking through the viewfinder is also really nice. I might get hard from this again.”

Kurama: “Alright ready when you are. Oh wait a bit. I want you to declare I’m gonna have sex with Mr. Nagito before you’re gonna strip. Like in an adult video, it turns me on.”

Kurama: “Hm? What’s wrong? Even if you stiffen up the situation won’t change. That part is innocent and cute, but nothing will start nor end in this situation. Okay? Strip for me. Oh, are you gonna strip? Yes yes you’re a good girl.”

Kurama: “Ah, declare it with a smile before stripping okay?”

Kurama: “Ahh. Wow. It’s so much better than my imagination. Ah I’m excited again.”

Kurama: “Ah, make a peace sign right there.”

Kurama: “Your insides must also be much better than my imagination. But I must still hold it in.”

Kurama: “Come on don’t stop your hands. Properly take off your underwear too.”

Kurama: “Ah the one you took off... leave it in the basket over there.”

Kurama: “So much better than your skin that I imagined.”

Kurama: “I see you’re the type to look thinner in clothes. Ah don’t hide it.”

Kurama: “Then I’ll leave the camera here.”

Kurama: “Ah so soft. I’ve always wanted to touch them.”

Kurama: “When I touch your boobs and your precious place like this, you gasp with a delicate voice.”

Kurama: “But the expression you have right now is much better than the one you make in my imagination. It’s realistic, erotic, and so much more lively. Cute.”

Kurama: “Ah. You’re nipples stood up. So it feels good. I’m so happy. Feel it more. I’ll grind against you like this and give you a lot of kisses.”

**Kissing noises**

Kurama: “It’s okay to let out your voice you know. If it feels good you have to say it feels good.”

**Kissing noises intensifies**

Kurama: “I want to put piercings here. As proof that you’re mine. I’ll let them make cute custom ones.”

Kurama: “You turn red and then turn blue. You’re a really busy one.”

**Kisses**

Kurama: “It’s okay. I’m not telling you to do it now. Cause I’ll gradually and carefully make you’re body unable to live without me.”

Kurama: “Alright. Then next up is... I’ll let you touch this. Spread your legs.”

Kurama: “You’re such a bashful person. Cute. But I want you to show me your important place.”

Kurama: “Mmm hehehehe. You’re still embarassed. I love innocent girls.”

**Kisses**

Kurama: “Then nevermind that for now. Instead, will you suck me? Then I’ll forgive you.”

Kurama: “I’m glad. Then lick it tenderly.”

Kurama: “Look, isn’t it amazing. It got so big. I wonder if it’ll completely fit into your mouth. Come, say ah-”

**Sloppy sounds and moaning**

Kurama: “I’ve had this imagination multiple times. An imagination where you give me a fella like this. But you know, even if I’m aroused and put it into the doll’s mouth it doesn’t feel good at all. It’s stiff, the tongue isn’t soft, and it’s cold. And above all, the expression is completely expressionless. Even if I pat her head or softly touch her cheek, the doll only makes an indifferent face.”

Kurama: “When it comes to that, the real thing is really nice. You’re soft and warm, and you make cute expressions.”

Kurama: “Ah this is the best. In my imagination, you do your best to suck while I tenderly grasp your head like this and shove myself deeply inside you. But it’s also nice when you voluntarily use your tongue like that.”

**Sloppy sounds and moaning**

Kurama: “I kinda feel like letting it out already.”

Kurama: “What should I do? Where shall I let it out? Inside your mouth? Or should I pour it over that cute face of yours? What should I do?”

Kurama: “I guess I’ll let you drink it after all. It’s so exciting to let my semen become your nourishment. I’m gonna grab your head for a bit but stay put okay?”

Kurama: “Oh if it hurts please raise your right hand okay?”

**Sloppy noises and moaning intensifies**

Kurama: “I’m about to cum. When I cum, make sure to save up my semen on your tongue alright?”

Kurama: “I’m gonna scold you if you just swallow it, understand?”

**Sloppy noises and moaning intensifies x2**

**>///<**

Kurama: “Okay, open your mouth. Good girl. Properly taste the semen saved up on your tongue.”

Kurama: “That’s right, stirr it like that and mix it with your saliva.”

Kurama: “Okay, swallow it.”

**Swallows**

Kurama: “Now, say thanks for the meal.”

Kurama: “Ah are you alright? Eh the semen got spilled. Hmm. That’s not a good thing to do. You should clean up if you dirty someone’s floor. You must lick the semen from the floor and clean it up. I’ll make a video footage again. Come on, lick the floor clean.”

**Camera sounds**

Kurama: “You don’t wanna?”

Kurama: “You know, I don’t like to forcefully make you listen. So I wish you’d do it voluntarily. Okay? No good? You’re a good girl so you can do it right?”

Kurama: “That’s right, you’re a good girl. Indeed, lick it with more care.”

Kurama: “Hehehe how nice.”

Kurama: “You’re right, I’ll forgive you for saying you hate me.”

Kurama: “Ehehe but I never said what I’d forgive you for.”

Kurama: “Besides, it’s not like I’m really angry. I’m not that narrow-minded to get angry for that.”

Kurama: “Well then, what should we play next?”

Kurama: “Hmmm... ugh there’s nothing interesting here. Ehh I’ll guess I’ll go buy some. Oh, we could use this.”

**Sound of tape**

Kurama: “Oh this? Just what it looks like, it’s duckttape.”

Kurama: “Stay put.... just... for a bit...”

Kurama: “Alright. And now. It may be a bit tough but please bear with it okay.”

Kurama: “Alright it should be fine like this.”

**Struggles**

Kurama: “It’s no use struggling.”

**Struggles**

Kurama: “Hmmm... I don’t really do this a lot so I feel kinda bad. It must be tough. But you know, if you cause a ruckus you’ll bother the neighbours. It’ll also trouble me so please bear with it like that for a little while.”

Kurama: “There you go. Woah light. You must get enough nutrients you know. A while back, you said over the phone to your friend you were dieting, but you really don’t need to lose more weight than this okay?”

**Opens closet**

Kurama: “Okay, please stay here for a bit.”

Kurama: “Oh. Those eyes make a bit thrilled. I’ll give you plenty of love when I come back.”

**Closes closet**

------------

(T/N this was so embarassing _///_)

* Kashiori = a box of cakes commenly given on a final day before leaving.

** Tamagohada = (lit. egg skin) an expression that means skin as white as an egg.

-----------

Tracks

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Bonus 1 | Bonus 2

#The Neighbour in Room 203 Disappeared Leaving a Key Behind #203 Gou No Rinjin Ha Kagitaba Hitotsu Nokoshi Te Kie Ta #dramacd #english #translation #203号の隣人は鍵束一つ残して消えた #track 2 #male yandere

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happykjd · 3 years ago

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exo-l japan official book #15 - chen's interview

q: are you the type of person who can separate on and off? or are you the type that thinks about work during the holidays? i’m the type that can completely separate them. but honestly, it’s impossible to forget work during private time since it’s always in my head. that’s why i think about what i should do the next day. what are some things i could have improved today, i think of that kind of thing that can help my work in the future, to get rid of negativity. emotionally, i can separate it too, but it’s really hard. if i start thinking of something, i have other thoughts as well and feeling which make it hard to stop thinking. but i try hard to not let out any negative feelings. when i’m on break, i just rest. i space out while playing music or watching movies, or while i’m taking a bath (laughs)

q: how do you “switch” your motivation on? i don’t really need a switch. it might be because i’m too used to the way i live now, but when i’m outside or working i can automatically switch myself into work mode. maybe there’s a switch in my body and that's why i feel i can get into working mode easily.

q: what are some hobbies you’ve been into lately? i’m more into in hobbies i can do at home, since i can’t go out as often because of the pandemic. i’ve been making things with beads, and doing flower arranging. lately i’ve also been challenging myself and cooking, mainly grilled foods. but i’m a total beginner, so i’m not good at all. i only started it a month ago (laughs) but even someone like me can cook with some help through cooking tutorials (laughs) i don’t think it tasted bad. i can’t tell if i have the talent to be good at cooking or not (laughs)

q: what’s the difference between exo chen and soloist chen? they both represent the person called chen. instead of being different, there is chen as exo and chen during his solo activities, they’re all the same chen. however, soloist chen wants to show a more lyrical side, so i think he has a more approachable image. it wasn’t done on purpose, but it’s the way i’m doing things i wanted to do freely as a soloist.

q: what color would you use to describe your voice? i think it would be like fog. it’s white and a little foggy, with a little sadness to it. honestly i don’t like my voice that much (laughs) i admire a voice that feels white and has a sunny feeling instead of a foggy one.

q: how do you choose which songs to share on your youtube channel? i pick everything myself. i take into account requests from fans, but i tend to pick songs that i like, or things i want to express in the form of songs. i pick them to match my thoughts and interests.

q: what role do you think you play in the group? lately i feel like i need to protect my position as main vocalist (laughs) lately i’ve seen the members practicing their own vocals a lot (laughs) seeing them work hard makes me nervous, and i feel like i should work harder on dancing (laughs) i want to take center of the group. that doesn’t mean i want to be the center in choreography, but supporting all the members. i want something neutral like that. when the other members need me, i’ll support them. i want to make exo an even better group.

q: what motto do you keep in mind as an artist? don’t get too full of yourself. there are times when i’m full of myself, though (laughs) there are times when i need to be that way, but i feel like if i get too full of myself i won’t be working as hard to improve myself and can’t move forward. that’s why i always keep this thought in mind.

q: is there anything you want to work on in terms of growing as an artist? practice. just that, nothing else. as time goes on, music changes with trends, so i feel like there’s often a need to improve my skills. i always practice to match the way trends in music change.

q: what kind of activities would you like to try to challenge yourself as an artist in the future? instead of challenging myself with a specific genre or concept, one of my goals is to work hard and focus on the tasks in front of me. i think the way i sing a year from now and how i’ll sing ten years from now will be different, but i want to make sure i can express all my feelings while performing. (src)

#kim jongdae #chen #jongdae #exo #the emotional rollercoaster this took me on.......#like between being thrilled by his hobbies to soft over his love for everything and then him saying he DOESN'T LIKE HIS VOICE....#skjdnf i mean nobody likes the sound of their own voice but dude! you are the exception !!!!!!!#exo-l japan official book 15 #on & off #trans #long post for ts

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knitting-with-norbert · 4 years ago

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Getting Through THOSE Nights

(taken from my blog, link in bio!)

I’ve been having a lot of THOSE nights (capital let’s and italics very much needed)

It’s taken me years of getting through nights where I can’t sleep because I feel like I can’t breathe and I can’t be alone with my thoughts because holy shit that just not at all remotely what I need before I’ve gotten to this point where I have at least a small list of resources that consistently help me get through them

And just in case anyone out there reading this is having one of those nights themselves, here is that list. Please add on your own through comments or messaging me to add one – any suggestions are so, so appreciated if you think that they will help others in getting through those times

As far as I’m aware at the time of posting all of these resources are completely free to use and all the links work, if not let me know

Creativity

Free knitting patterns – Easy knitting patterns for beginners. Even if you’re experienced with knitting on those nights sometimes all you want is something easy that you can complete quickly. Lovecrafts also has a lot of more advanced free knitting patterns if you want more of a challenge

Word Sprints – They start every half an hour, just write as much as you can. Be it a short story, poem, novel chapter or anything. Write to get your thoughts out and don’t stop writing. You get a star for every 100 words and it’s very satisfying (Here’s a link to my room – Nifty-Frogs-153 if you want some company there’s a chance me or someone else might be in there, otherwise it’s very easy to join the global sprint or create your own room)

This is Sand – Create some art online using different coloured sand

Weave Silk – Creates beautiful patterns that are really satisfying to watch and look at

Write a Letter – This isn’t an online resource, just something that I do to alleviate a little of my anxiety, which is to write a letter to myself. It works in a similar way to the word sprints, but a bit different in that I am directly trying to talk to myself and make sense of my thoughts

Listening

Spotalike – Put in a song that you like and it’ll create you a playlist based off of that song

Chill music – There’s a load of these on YouTube that you can check out but this is the one that I tend to come back to

Rain for Me – Listening to the rain to relax

The Boy, The Mole, The Fox and The Horse Audio – Tim Uffindell reading the audiobook

Websites

Press this button – to make everything okay!

Neal.fun – This website is full of fun little mini-games and sites that serve as good distractions, I’ve linked a couple of my favourites below! Macaroni Draw – Paint with pasta Progress – Watch the progression of time Your Empire – Conquer the world based on the places you’ve visited

Picrew – I like to find fun-looking picrews to make either myself or just to mess around in!

Videos

Hermitcraft Season 7 – The playlist of all of Grian’s Hermitcraft videos from season 7. Even if you don’t typically watch Minecraft videos, Hermitcraft is the most relaxing thing to watch and season 7 Grian especially brought me a lot of comfort

Kitten Livestream – 24 hour livestream to watch kittens playing

Otter Livestream – 24 hour livestream to watch otters playing (there’s a load of other aquarium-based livestreams on here too: sharks, jellyfish, etc. it’s just that I love otters)

Twitch – You’ll always be able to find someone to watch as background noise on Twitch as a distraction, I’ve linked a couple of my favourites below

Organisations

The Butterfly Project – For when you feel the urge to self harm

Samaritans – I believe this is just a UK based project (other than the email service, though please don’t use this for emergencies) Call 116 123

The Trevor Project – A US-based project set up to help struggling LGBTQ+ teens Call 1-866-488-7386

7 Cups – Online support for those that need it

Please do add suggest some of your own coping tools to get through those nights, I hope that you’re all staying safe and keeping well

Freddie 🐸

#long post #anxiety #anxiety disorder #generalised anxiety disorder #coping mechanism #insomnia #anxiety tools #depression #depression tools #mental health #mental health sucks #mental health awareness #mental health suggestions

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amjustagirl · 4 years ago

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Hogwarts AU (Haikyuu!!)

feat. Kuroo Tetsuro

As requested by @forgetou (hope you love it bb!)

Previously: Miya Atsumu. Miya Osamu. Kita Shinsuke

Masterlist link here

Warnings: Tooth-rotting fluff

A/N: Any other characters you’d like to see? Send me an ask!

(happy to do any characters other than Kenma / Hinata / Tendo - I don’t trust myself to do them justice!)

------------------------------------------------------------------

‘So I hear you’re going to fill in for Hinata next match?’

Your head whips around. A growl builds up in your throat.

You’d recognise that sleaze ball voice anywhere - Kuroo Tetsuro, Slytherin prefect, top student in potions and more importantly, the scumbag keeper that formulated a strategy (alongside Oikawa, that brat - but that’s besides the point) to completely break down the Gryffindor chaser trio of Hinata, Lev and Yamamoto when Iwaizumi was out for an injury the last Quidditch match.

If you weren’t playing against them, you’d admit that the Slytherin strategy was perfect. Suna and Daishou caged Hinata in with non-stop bludger head shots, and the Miya twins flew literal circles around Lev - still a beginner, so you’ll cut him some slack, so much that the two idiots collided when Kuroo feinted forward and they thought they finally had a chance to score.

So now you have to step into Hinata’s position for the match next weekend.

You like Quidditch well enough, but you don’t have an overwhelming passion for it the way Hinata or Oikawa or Atsumu or heck, even Yaku does - monsters, the lot of them. You play it for fun, you enjoy being a reserve member, and you’d never expected that you’d have to play in an actual match with Iwaizumi, Lev, Hinata and Yamamoto all playing chaser already.

You’re scared - and you hate feeling this way, especially a Gryffindor like you, so you snarl and hiss and kick your feet when Yaku drags you away from Kuroo, the demon keeper scolding you not to ‘cause a scene in the Great Hall - seriously, what are you five?’, though Lev and Yamamoto cheers you on.

‘Come on, let’s make a bet on our match next weekend’, Kuroo calls after you, and you flail hard in Yaku’s arms enough that Yaku loses not just his balance, but his grip on you.

‘Sure’, you shout defiantly, not caring that the pair of you have attracted an audience. You can see the entire Slytherin team five steps away, matching Cheshire grins on all of their faces. Your blood boils and you’re ready to accept the terms of whatever stupid bet this rooster head proposes.

Kuroo’s grin widens. ‘I bet you can’t even get five goals past me.’

‘I bet you I can’, you retort, even as your heart sinks. Kuroo isn’t quite as good as Yaku, but he’s devious and brilliant at feints and you’re not even a starter on the Gryffindor team. But you’ve dug yourself into a hole, and you’re determined to commit to your position, damnit, so you keep your voice steady as you ask for his terms.

‘If I win, you’ll have to go on a date with me the next weekend’. He waggles his eyebrows at you suggestively, eyes crinkling at its corners in amusement as you mouth an outraged ‘what the hell?’ and Yaku starts shouting bloody murder himself.

You gather yourself and resist Yaku’s attempts at pulling you away. ‘And if I win, what do I get?’

Kuroo laughs airily. ‘I highly doubt that, but name your price, sweetheart’.

You think of the most embarrassing thing you could possibly inflict on this smug bastard, your eyes landing on the ridiculous mop of hair on his head and it’s your turn to grin, sharp and full of edges.

‘Fine. If I win, you’ll shave your head’.

‘Deal.’

Kuroo sticks his hand out to you and you take it. You feel like you’ve just made a deal with the devil himself.

------------------------------------------------

Iwaizumi nags you to bits when Yaku tells him of the entire debacle, the Gryffindor keeper throwing himself dramatically across the locker room bench, complaining that he’s done being a damn babysitter to this lot of idiots without any sense of self preservation.

‘You’re gonna need a whole lot of training in that case’, Iwaizumi tells you grimly, and you sigh, because you know it’s not going to do any good.

And you’re right, because even though you’ve spent the entire week training and running drills in snow and sleet and rain, it’s not enough. You barely get three goals against Kuroo in the match, let alone five - and to be fair, one of them was when you literally threw Lev against him when the referee wasn’t looking, so you resign yourself to his mocking looks when the whistle blows, marking the end of the match where Oikawa outsmarts Kageyama to grab the snitch out of the air first. You feel a kinship with the captured snitch, the pathetic fluttering of its wings so much like your futile attempts to win the damn bet.

Kuroo smirks at you knowingly when you refuse to take his hand at the end of the game. ‘I guess I’ll be seeing you next weekend?’ he asks, eyes glinting as you huff and fold your arms across your chest.

‘Fine, I guess’, you answer with a distinct lack of grace. You don’t notice when his smirk turns into a genuine smile.

------------------------------------------------

The Gryffindor boys crowd around you, groaning in disappointment when you tell them no they’re not allowed to follow you around Hogsmeade, even if you’re on a date with Kuroo Tetsuro - and no, Lev, a disguise is not going to work, your height and ridiculous hair makes you far too conspicuous for that!

‘I’ll beat him up if he does anything’, Iwaizumi threatens, and you roll your eyes at his overprotective streak.

‘I’ll be fine’, you reply, shrugging off Yaku’s attempts at giving you ridiculous magic artifacts intended to ward off wandering hands. Kuroo Tetsuro may be insufferable and smug and a general pain in the butt, but he’s not an absolute piece of shit - plus, you’re handy with your wands in duels so you’re certain you can handle anything he throws at you.

You don’t even bother putting on a lick of makeup when you prepare to meet him. He magicks an enchanted paper plane to land on your desk during potions to tell you that he’ll pick you up from Gryffindor tower at three o’clock sharp, and he’s leaning against the pillar with feline grace as you tumble out of the portrait hole, your teammates shooting him deadly glares as he sweeps you off with his palm warm against the small of your back.

‘Want to grab a drink first?’ he asks, with a surprising amount of concern when your nose turns pink in the cold.

You nod hesitantly, expecting him to drag you into the pink and white monstrosity that is Madam Puddifoots to complete your humiliation, but he doesn’t - holding the door open to the Three Broomsticks, ushering you into the corner booth, ordering a pint of butterbeer for you.

‘My team’s not here, don’t worry’, he says, laughing when you glance around the pub, eyes narrowed for any signs of that odious Oikawa or the bothersome Miya twins - or worse, snarky Suna and devious Daishou, but Kuroo isn’t lying, none of them are around to witness the indignity of your date with one Kuroo Tetsuro.

‘Do you drag unwilling girls into pubs often?’ you snark, tapping your fingers on the table irritably.

‘Nah, only you’, he answers easily, smirk widening with mirth when you wrinkle your nose at him. ‘Come on, lighten up a bit - we might as well get to know each other since we’re going to be spending the whole afternoon together.’

‘Fine’, you say sourly, brightening only when the bartender brings your drinks. ‘Why don’t you tell me about yourself’.

And so even though you’ve been classmates with Kuroo for years, you learn for the first time that he’s not intending to be a professional Quidditch player when he graduates next year, even though you admit he’s a talented keeper in his own right.

‘Really? You’re giving up Quidditch?’

‘Yeah - I have it all thought out I’m going to study potions further and figure out how to revolutionise the potions industry - d’you know the muggles have a pharmaceuticals industry that’s like our potions industry, only hugely profitable?’

It’s so typical of a Slytherin that you can’t help but snort.

But then he disarms you with funny stories of himself growing up. You learn that his parents separated when he was only five, and as a result, he stayed mostly with his grandparents growing up. You learn that he was lonely and shy and awkward - really? you? you choke on your butterbeer incredulously - at least until he moved next door to Kenma from Ravenclaw.

‘I introduced him to Quidditch, and he’s a natural at coming up with strategies’, he says proudly, proceeding to chatter fondly of quiet, unsociable Kenma, who you can tell is his little brother in all but name and blood.

You tell him about growing up with three older brothers - all Gryffindors, just like you. He listens to your stories about breaking your arm when you stole your eldest brother’s broom, chuckles at your recounting of the pranks you pull on your teammates to remind them that you may be a girl, but you can take of yourself just fine - because Iwaizumi and Yaku tend to take their protective side a tad too far sometimes.

It’s so pleasant that you forget that your date is the result of a bet, and you don’t even think twice about raising a napkin to gently wipe the froth from butterbeer off the corner of Kuroo’s mouth - it comes with the territory of being teammates with messy eaters like Hinata and Kageyama - until he freezes in shock.

‘I’m sorry!’ you blurt out, mortified. But instead of teasing you for your forwardness, Kuroo turns bright red and gapes at you. He must think you’re an idiot. ‘Um - d’you want to check out Honeydukes before they close?’ you ask, in a desperate attempt to diffuse the awkwardness of the situation.

That jolts Kuroo out of his daze. Thankfully, any awkwardness vanishes when he slides out of his seat to steal the bill from you. You complain because he refuses point blank to split the bill with you, and he even playfully keeps his hands above his head to avoid your attempts at pressing coins into his hands until you reach the candy store.

You watch in amusement as he loads his basket with chocolates and sweets for his team. He gets dark chocolate for Miya Osamu, and white chocolate for his twin Atsumu - at this point, I’m convinced they’re just determined to like the opposite of what the other prefers just to be contrary, he laughingly tells you. He gets creamy nougats for Oikawa - I should stop by the bread store to get him mlik bread, but his fangirls spoil him enough so I shan’t, he says. Ice mice for Suna to prank the twins with, tooth flossing stringmints for Daishou - he needs to clean his fangs, he jokes, and a whole bunch of chocolate frogs to be used as bribes for Kenma to go to bed on time.

It’s lovely and warm in the store. You have a good time tossing fizzing frisbees behind the storekeeper’s back at Kuroo, dodging as he tries to drop jellybeans down your shirt. At the checkout counter, you protest again when he slyly tells the cashier that he’ll pay for your purchases on top of his, and he doesn’t even let you carry your own chocolates as you’re walking back to the castle.

‘I’m perfectly capable of carrying a bag of chocolates by myself’, you huff, annoyed that yet another boy is treating you as though you’re made of glass.

‘I believe you’ Kuroo replies emphatically, pressing his hand to his chest with dramatic flair. ‘But I’m also a kind and considerate soul, because someone forgot to bring her gloves, and I’m going to need to save your hands if you actually want a shot at trying to get more goals past me next time’.

You scowl. ‘Fine’, but you relent grudgingly. You didn’t even know he noticed that your hands are numb and cold. You’ve just never enjoyed the cold, and to make matters worse, it’s snowing. A chilly wind picks up, and you sneeze thrice in quick succession.

‘Can’t wait to get back indoors, or can’t wait for the date to be over?’, he comments as you pick up your pace, trudging through the cold wet snow. You open your mouth to retort, but your jaw drops when he tugs you to a stop, tucking his cloak securely over your shoulders. His body heat and the faint scent of cinnamon and butterbeer still lingers in the fabric and you can’t help but wrap his cloak tighter around yourself.

‘There’, he says, satisfied. ‘Better?’

You nod, not trusting yourself to respond.

He walks you all the way back to Gryffindor tower and when you try to return his cloak, to your surprise, he refuses to take it back.

‘Keep it for our next date’, he tells you cheekily, laughing when your eyes widen and you choke on your breath.

‘I don’t recall hearing you ask for a second date’, you reply archly when your body finally stops its attempts at expelling your lungs from your chest.

‘Well, I am now’, he replies.

You look at him. Though the smirk he wears on his lips is unwavering, you can see a hint of uncertainty in his eyes. And though you’d never think you’d ever say it, but the afternoon was a pleasure, and Kuroo was a lovely date.

You - you like him, this adorable dork of a boy who’s both charming and confident yet awkward and uncertain at the same time. He’s caring and funny and ambitious and there are so many facets of him that you’ve only discovered today - and if you’re being honest with yourself, you’re curious enough to want to delve deeper into the enigma that is one Kuroo Tetsuro.

‘Fine’, you mumble, the tips of your ears turning pink. This time it’s definitely not from the cold.

‘Yeah?’ he asks, quietly, uncertainly.

‘Yeah’, you reply softly, casting your gaze down to the floor, suddenly shy. You don’t notice him take a step forward, startling as he gently tilts your chin up to face him. Your first instinct is to snap at him for coming so close, but he’s too quick for you to even react, leaning down and pressing his lips to your forehead, tenderly tucking loose strands of hair behind your ear.

‘Next week then’, he says, with a wide smile before sweeping off, leaving you standing in the middle of the corridor, mouth open in shock.

The portrait door swings open.

‘WHY ARE YOU IN GREEN AND SILVER?!’

‘HOLY SHIT, WAIT A MINUTE IS THAT KUROO’S CLOAK?’

‘Did he curse you? DO WE NEED TO DEFEND YOUR HONOUR?’

You bury your burning face in your hands. Your teammates are not going to take this well.

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